Becoming the Past
by Rurouni Angel
Summary: Kaoru has found out about Kenshins past, and now she is changing.(sorry for the spelling and the shortness.)
1. Default Chapter

Becoming the Past  
  
By: Rurouni Angel  
  
Homepage: http://skittles242.tripod.com  
  
Email: AngelHarley11268@gateway.net  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin nor it's  
  
charaters, so please don't think I do....  
  
((((((((((((((((((  
  
  
  
Bringing the brokken down once more Karou pushed back the tears,  
  
and the anger that threatened to spill over. Some how he had been  
  
able to make her crumble once more. Only he could make her into  
  
someone she didn't not know, or liked. Only he made her feel these  
  
odd feelings, but what Karou hated more that anything was she  
  
could not hate him for it. No hating him was impossible, not when  
  
she loved him so much.  
  
And yet this time was different, though she didn't know why or how?  
  
It was just this feeling she had, the pain was innocent, for he didn't  
  
even know of it's existence. Not aware that her heart was shattering into  
  
thousands of pieces. Cause for the first time he was not the cause,  
  
not that he was totally blameless, but yet the past was the past. And no  
  
matter how badly Karou wanted to change it she couldn't.  
  
Closing her eyes Karou heard his voice again as he spoke of her.  
  
The women that had been known as the Battousai wife, 'Tomoe.'  
  
There it was, the reason behind her madness, her anger, her tears,  
  
her pain, her fear. There was so much to think about when it came  
  
to her, like what was she like? She had to be someone...special... to  
  
have tamed someone like the battousai? Was she beautiful? Was she  
  
kind and understanding? Was she comforting? Or did she just let  
  
things be as fated intended?  
  
Blinking back the tears once more Karou tried once more to picture  
  
the loving wife of the battousai, and came up short. Maybe it was  
  
cause of the battousai himself that threw her off? That man  
  
different than the rurouni that she had come to love. So where did  
  
that leave her? Scared was as good guess as any.  
  
Scared of what? Those glowing amber eyes? Of the heated look  
  
within them? Only one person could answer that question and she  
  
wasn't about to go ask him. She wasn't about to call out the very image she feared. If fear was the correct term that could be applied? But somewhere she knew the really reason why didn't want to face the ambered eyed man, for indeed she was scared. And yet the catch was, she wasn't exactly afraid of him per-say, it was something else completely.  
  
Maybe it was the promise of passion and desire that he let come forth? Maybe only when the color of fire amber over took him did it scare her? The promise of untold pleasure, unspeakable desire? Only seeking acceptance, in all of his unbinding nature? Always seeking something that to Karou seemed distance. And yet in all his un binding glory she really didn't scare her the way he should. His name was suppose to strike fear deep within ones heart, or hatred. Still in this moment everything that was the Battousai, didn't even steal her breath. It was the thought of… her.  
  
The battousai wife, a mere women. One that had done what she her self could not yet do. Love and not fear that side of a simple man. The comparison between herself and …her… was unthinkable. Something she simply didn't want to think of. For if she did, she knew that Megumi's words would ring true.  
  
Your no replacement for Tomoe-san. How could Sir Ken love someone like you after loving someone like her?  
  
The bubbling of her emotion at Megumi's words let finally voice her anger, fear, and most of her disappoint in one big scream. Swinging her brokken down in one big powerful swing, Kaoru felt her legs give way and felt the hardness of the ground as she fell. Lowering her head in defeat she blindly let her tears fall, not caring of any thing else.  
  
Never hearing soft padding footsteps round the corner, not until it was to late to dry her tears. Tensing at the voice of the man behind her turmoil.  
  
Karou-dono?  
  
  
  
))))))))  
  
tbc 


	2. wanting answers

I know it's been a while! Gomen that I haven't updated, but with school and work…blah you ya know how it goes.!  
  
Nope I STILL own nothing, and the one thing I do own you ya ain't getting her.  
  
  
  
Kaoru jerked her head at the sound of Kenshin's voice. Not sure on how to react to his sudden appearance, not sure on his reaction would be? Wishing that the tears that still ran down her cheeks would some how disappear. Wishing that he would not see them? Hoping that if he did, he would not comment on them. But somewhere she knew better, she knew that…he…the battousai…would notice. Then he would demand to know the cause of her tears her sadness. The next question was… what would be her answer???  
  
  
  
Suddenly the silence was broking by Kenshin softly walking over where she laid on the ground. Fear came overwhelming and she pushed her self away from him. Kaoru watched as shock entered his eyes, and then a puzzled gaze took over. But it didn't matter. Nothing mattered to her at the moment, nothing but…him! The battousai… suddenly her fear, anger, and uneasiness came to the surface. Demanding that…he…take away these…emotions that he had put within her.  
  
Sure it was her rurouni that had told her of the battousai wife…told her of what must have been this wonderful love? But for some reason the rorouni's account of the great and wonderful woman didn't help her figure where…she…stood with him? Exactly what did she mean to this man? Battousai and rurouni alike!  
  
Suddenly Kaoru didn't care if she was scared on the glowing ambered eyes man, she wanted his attention, long enough to find out her meaning. Reaching up she wiped her tears away, coming to stand tall. Kaoru raised her eyes to look Kenshin in the eyes and saw a confused look within the redhead's eyes. Next she saw his lips move.  
  
"Kaoru-dono?"  
  
Kaoru set herself to the battle that was sure to come, cause she was not giving up until she had her answers.  
  
"Kaoru-dono is there something the matter? Maybe I can help, that I can?"  
  
Kaoru smiled a sad smile and looked directly into Kenshins' eyes. Summoning her strength Kaoru walking over to the rurouni and with a small and soft voice, she did the one thing she never wanted to do…  
  
"Battousai I wish to speak to you, directly!"  
  
To bad for Kaoru, in all her sadness, her eyes had became blank taking on a blackness that was unbecoming on her. But somewhere in the haze of the battousai sleeping mind, the blackness reminded him of a woman that had called him anata. 


	3. battousai awakes

Becoming the Past

By: Angel

Disclaimer: I own nothing but some really wonderful people do.

***** ***** *****

Snapping my eyes open I readjusted to the light that shone within the dojo hall. Cocking my head slightly to the side I quickly took in my surroundings. Briefly remembering I been here once before, in my fight with Saito. It was also my second glimpse of a very beautiful girl. Very beautiful indeed.

Frowning as I felt the so called "rurouni" demanding control once more. Wondering why it was again I was bought forth? Glancing at the raven haired beauty I recalled that she had, for a lack of better words, _summoned_ me. Righting myself to stand before her, narrowing my eyes I took a second to study the young girl in front of me. Instantly I notice,

__

Sadness

Fear

Confusion

Quickly I scanned the rurouni part of myself, searching for the answers, demanding them! Suddenly the girl moves to stand back from me almost as if she was in fear of me. Swiftly I assured her,

"No need for fear with me, Kaoru. I have not, nor will I harm you."

Fresh tears fell at my words, puzzling me further. Grinding my teeth I suddenly snap,

"Stop that. I have never hurt you, nor will I. So stop cowering." 

As suddenly as my out burst had came so did hers'.

"You baka, Hurt me? You have hurt me in more way then any other person I have known has."

I had been in mid reach of her arm when she spoke those words. Suddenly my arm felt heavier than it should, but my head, well…..

It was pounding.

Not from an headache, nor from me taken control. Simply my head was pounding because, I was…was

__

Pissed.

I could almost feel the heat coming from my eyes, surely as I once was told, that they look like a wolf's eyes. To close of a resembles to Saito for my liking. But Saito was not my opponent, but yet this was a battle none the less. 

Laughter wasn't something that _I_ heard often, even if it was a sad, hollow sound. And yet I listened to Kaoru as she laughed and cried at the same time. Demanding I hissed,

"Hurt you? I have never, and I grow tired of repeating myself. If this something the rurouni has done then take the matter up with him."

Quickly her eyes found mine and she takes a moment to stare within my golden eyes, and then she snaps,

"The rurouni? Hai I suppose you _could_ say this is his fault. But then I would be lying to completely blame him."

Cocking my head to the side I wonder at her statement, so the rurouni was at fault here? Then why must I be involved? I would rather be back in the abyss with the haunting pair of black eyes. I stopped when I realized that those eyes I had been haunted by for so long had somehow suddenly changed colors?

"Then I suggest we leave this for the rurouni and yourself to sort out."

"**NO"**

Raising an eyebrow I watched as Kaoru squared her shoulders and faced me. Looking me dead in the eye, whispering

"I wish to speak of…..of…..Himura Tomoe."

My eyes narrow as my hand tightens around the hilt of my sword, manners completely forgotten.

"Do _not_ speak of something in which you know nothing about little girl."

I watched as something flashed in Kaoru's eyes, and I heard the rurouni within pleading to take control once more. Some where in the rurouni's thought I felt an understanding, I also felt a need to smooth Kaoru's soul. 

But she had said something unforgivable.

Softly I whisper caresses my ears,

"Is that so? Is that how you…….."

Her voice waived, but she continued tears and all,

"Go away _Battousai_, I found the answer I seek. Just give me my rurouni back."

Something made me watch every tear that fell, something inside me answered her plea the best way I knew how,

"**_I_** am not going anywhere just yet."

With that her head snapped up and she yelled,

"Give me back my rurouni, your not **wanted** here!"

Grinding my teeth once more I watched as Kaoru's pain flash around her soul, her _ki_ telling me that I was missing something?

Softly I heard a whisper within my ears, coming from the rurouni.

__

She **needs** to know **you**.

Needs me? What was the baka ravening about?

__

Tomoe

**__**

Stop it I hissed back.

__

Kaoru

**__**

Stop it 

__

Black and plums 

****

Stop it NOW!

__

Blue and jasmine

So _what_ I yelled back, then I heard the rurouni give a small cry as he fell silent. Alone in my thought I dawned on me what the rurouni had been doing. Snapping my head up to met Kaoru's tear stained face. Stunned I would only whisper in surprise,

"You _wanted_ me?"

Her fear showed as I watched her nod.


End file.
